Funny PoemsLast Updated: February 22, 2021
A hand-picked selection of funny poems suitable for adults and kids. These poems are sure to make you laugh due to their silly but hilarious use of english language.
- There once was a man from Peru.
Who dreamed he was eating his shoe.
He woke up at night.
With a terrible fright.
To find out his dream had come true!
- Our school trip was a special occasion.
But we never reacher our destination.
Instead of the zoo.
I was locked in the loo.
of the toilet at the service station!
- An elderly man called Keith.
Mislaid his set of false teeth.
They'd been laid on a chair.
He'd forgot they were there.
Sat down, and was bitten beneath.
- When I'm old and mankey.
I'll never use a hanky.
I'll wee on plants.
and soil my pants!
- All doggies go to heaven - or so I've been told.
They run and play along the streets of Gold.
Why is heaven such a doggie-delight?
Why, because there's not a single cat in sight!
- That's not my age; it's just not true.
My heart is young; the time just flew.
I'm staring at this strange old face,
And someone else is in my place!
- I am a dog.
And you are a flower.
I lift my leg up.
And give you a shower!
- I eat my peas with honey.
I've done it all my life.
It makes the peas taste funny.
But it keeps them on the knife!
- She fell into the bath tub.
she fell into the sink.
she fell into the rasberry jam.
and came out pink!
- Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
God made me pretty.
What happened to you!
- There was a young lady of Kent.
Whose nose was most awfully bent.
She followed her nose,
One day, I suppose,
And no one knows which way she went.
- If I were a furry bear.
And had a furry tummy.
I'd climb into a honey jar
And make my tummy yummy!
- There once was a child in Spain.
Who loved to play in the rain.
One day he tripped.
And broke his hip.
Now he is in serious pain.
- Last night at dinner we had some fish,
and though I tried, I did not finish.
My mother told me while I chewed,
brains loved fish over all other food.
- She avoided my eye contact,
and ticked my work in green.
But she knew trhat her body smells,
were foul and quite obscene.
- My dog is quite hip.
Except when he takes a dip.
He looks like a fool,
when he jumps in the pool,
and reminds me of a sinking ship.
- From time to time,
one needs a rhyme,
and if you're bright
you use this website.
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