Our collection of funny quotes which are short, easy to remember but still hilarious. Repeat or copy these quotes out to your friends to make them laugh!
- I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure.
- Doing nothing is hard, you never know when you're done.
- If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
- I am not lazy, I am on energy saving mode.
- Life is short, smile while you still have teeth.
- A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand.
- Maybe you should eat some makeup so you can be pretty on the inside too.
- I'm not shy, I'm holding back my awesomeness so I don't intimidate you.
- Sorry for the mean, awful, accurate things I said.
- I’m sorry, if you were right, I’d agree with you.
- Your life can't fall apart if you never had it together!
- People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.
- A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.
- If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
- Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
- The answer you're looking for is inside of you, but it's wrong
- One advantage of talking to yourself is that you know at least somebody's listening.
- The elevator to success is out of order. You’ll have to use the stairs.
- An apple a day keeps anyone away if you throw it hard enough.
- The more you weight the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, eat cake.
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