Jokes, Puns & Other Fun

60 Udderly Hilarious Cow Jokes & Puns

Last Updated: October 27, 2023

A list of the funniest jokes and puns about cows. These funny cow jokes are great for social media cow-related captions or just if you need some light-hearted humor to keep you a-moo-sed!

Cow related jokes

  1. Why can't cows wear shoes? Because they lactose.
    Funny joke about cows wearing shoes
  2. Why do cows have bells? Because their horns don't work.
  3. Why was the cow sad? She was moo-dy.
  4. What do cows read in the morning? The moos-paper.
  5. What do cows play at concerts? Moo-sic!
  6. You know what they say about cows... they're outstanding in their field.
  7. What do you call a cow in your backyard? A lawn-moower.
  8. Why don't cows have money? Because farmers milk them dry.
    Funny joke about cows money and farmers
  9. What does the farmer say to the cows at night? It's pasture bedtime.
  10. Knock knock.
    Who's There?
    Cow go.
    Cows go who?
    No, silly cows go moo.
  11. My cow just wandered into a field of marijuana. The steaks have never been so high.
  12. What do you call a cow that just gave birth? De-calf-inated.
  13. What do you call a cow who plays an instrument? – A moosician.
  14. What happens when you talk to a cow? It goes in one ear and out the udder!
    Funny cow joke
  15. What is a cow's favorite party game? Moo-sical chairs!
  16. Where do cows get their medicine? At the farm-acy.
  17. Why does a milking stool only have 3 legs? – Because the cow has the udder.
  18. How did the farmer find his lost cow? He tractor down.
  19. How does a farmer count cows? – With a cow-culator.
    Joke about a farmer counting cows
  20. Did you hear about the cow that tried to jump a barbwire fence? It was an udder disaster
  21. hat do you get when you cross an angry sheep and a moody cow? A baaaaaaad mooooood.
  22. Why did the two cows hate each other? They had beef.
  23. do cows stay up to date with current events? They read the moos-paper!
  24. did the cow go to space? Because it wanted to see the moooon!
  25. What did the farmer name his funniest cow? The Laughing Stock.

Punny phrases and sayings

  1. When the going gets tough, the tough get 'moo-ving'.
    Punny cow phrase
  2. It's moosic to our ears.
  3. Holy cow, that's amazing!
  4. The 'moo'-re, the merrier!
  5. Moo-ve over, I need some space.
  6. Let's milk this opportunity for all it's worth.
  7. In the moooood for some laughter?
  8. Life is udderly fantastic!
  9. Home is where the 'herd' is.
    Pun based cow-related saying
  10. Let's not make a misteak.
  11. The early bird catches the worm, but the early cow catches the grass.
  12. You can 'cow'nt on me.
  13. The key to success? 'Moo-deration' in all things.
  14. Mooo-ry Christmas!
  15. When life gives you lemons, make le-mooo-nade.
  16. An udder day, An udder dollar!

Funny Puns About Cows

  1. What did the cow confess to his therapist? I feel seen but not herd.
    Funny cow related pun
  2. Why was the cow so afraid of messing up? Because the steaks were high.
  3. What did the farmer say when his cow wouldn't produce milk? This is udderly problematic!
  4. Why are cows always broke? Someone's always milking them dry.
  5. Why is it so hard to hurt a cow's feelings? They're skin's as thick as leather.
  6. What did the mother cow say to the baby cow? It’s pasture bedtime.
  7. Why couldn’t the cow gain weight? She was more of a grazer.
  8. The farmer stopped telling cow puns because he butchered every joke.
  9. How do cows say 'thank you' for dinner in Spanish? Moo-chas grass-ias.
  10. Why couldn’t the cow learn? Everything went in one ear and out the udder.
    Udder related funny pun
  11. Why do cows wear bells around their necks? To make beautiful moooo-sic.
  12. What did the bull say to his son when he was going off to school? Bison!
  13. Did you hear about the famous cow? They say her milk is Legend-Dairy.
  14. The nursery rhyme cow was so excited about his new job that he was over the moooon.
  15. What do cows eat for breakfast? Moosli.
  16. What do you get when you sit under a cow? A pat on the head.
  17. When cow graduate, they get a 'moo'-ster's degree
  18. I met a cow who could solve complex equations. It was a moo-thematician
  19. What type of puzzle do cows like the most? A moo-doku

Make your own cow puns!

Top Tip: To create cow puns on your own, look for words or phrases that contain "mu" or similar sounds, and replace them with "moo.", here are some examples:

By applying this technique, you can come up with a wide range of cow-related puns with ease!

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Want to read more funny jokes?

We hope you enjoyed our list of the best cow humor. If you are looking for more jokes to laugh at, check out some of our related pages from the list below: