90 Funny Limericks Packed with Playful Punchlines

Enjoy our collection of 90 hand-picked funny limericks, a variation of the popular five line rhyming poem, which incorporate amusing stories and funny rhymes to make you laugh.

Remember that limericks, much like haiku poems, serve as an excellent starting point in the world of poetry and can enhance your writing skills. We hope that our list of funny limerick examples inspires you to take on the challenge of creating your own!

What is a Limerick?

For those of you who need a reminder, a limerick is a short, five-line poem renowned for its distinct rhyme scheme and playful rhythm. Typically humorous in nature, limericks often revolve around absurd scenarios or clever wordplay. You might recall crafting limericks during your school days, where the challenge of fitting a funny story into a concise structure became an exercise in english creativity. The distinctive AABBA rhyme scheme create a distinct musicality, making limericks enjoyable to read.

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Limericks with Silly Stories
Funny Animal Limericks (Ideal for kids)
Clever Wordplay Limericks
Limericks about Quirky Characters
Amusing Limericks on Relationships

Funny Limericks with Silly Stories

What makes a limerick really funny? It's the incorporation of silly situations and whimsical scenarios compressed into five clever lines. Our first section delves into precisely this aspect!

A fellow jumped off a high wall,
And had a most terrible fall.
He went back to bed,
With a bump on his head,
That's why you don't jump off a wall.
I'd rather have Fingers than Toes,
I'd rather have Ears than a Nose.
And as for my Hair,
I'm glad it's all there,
I'll be awfully said, when it goes.
I need a front door for my hall,
The replacement I bought was too tall.
So I hacked it and chopped it,
And carefully lopped it,
And now the dumb thing is too small.
I'm really determined and keen,
To start giving this house a spring clean.
I will do it I say,
Yes, I'll do it today,
Well, I'll do it tomorrow, I mean.
A painter, who lived in Great Britain,
Interrupted two girls with their knitting,
He said, with a sigh,
That park bench--well I,
Just painted it, right where you're sitting.
There was a young dentist who thrilled,
To the sound of a tooth being filled.
He would practise, they said,
Every night in his shed,
With the old drill he's skilled.
I've done it -- I've done mown the lawn,
But my muscles are aching and torn.
I could swear there are some,
In my legs and my bum,
I've not used since the year I was born.
There was an Old Man in a boat,
Who said, I'm afloat, I'm afloat!
When they said, No! you ain't!
He was ready to faint,
That unhappy Old Man in a boat.
There once was a wonderful star,
Who thought she would go very far.
Until she fell down,
And looked like a clown,
She knew she would never go far.
There once was a man from York,
who picked his nose with a fork.
He went for a pluck,
when it got stuck,
and walked around looking like a dork.
Once I visited France,
And learned a new, awesome dance.
I twirled,
And I swirled,
And then I lost my pants.
A young gourmet dining at Crewe,
Found a rather large mouse in his stew.
Said the waiter, Don't shout,
And wave it about,
Or the rest will be wanting one, too.
Remember when nearly sixteen,
On your very first date as a teen.
At the movies? If yes,
Then I bet you can't guess,
What was shown on the cinema screen.
I'm papering walls in the loo,
And quite frankly I haven't a clue.
For the pattern's all wrong,
Or the paper's too long,
And I'm stuck to the toilet with glue.
A robot with thoughts so bright,
Built a time machine, oh what a sight.
But it malfunctioned, oh dear,
Sent him back a whole year,
Now he's stuck in a loop, day and night!

Funny Animal Limericks - Ideal for Kids!

Discover the charm of animal related limericks, a sure hit with kids who adore these creatures!

I know an old owl named Boo,
Every night he yelled Hoo,
Once a kid walked by,
And started to cry,
And yelled I don't have a clue!
There once was a fly on the wall,
I wonder why didn't it fall.
Because its feet stuck,
Or was it just luck,
Or does gravity miss things so small?
A circus performer named Brian,
Once smiled as he rode on a lion.
They came back from the ride,
But with Brian inside,
And the smile on the face of the lion.
An elephant slept in his bunk,
And in slumber his chest rose and sunk.
But he snored -- how he snored!
All the other beasts roared,
So his wife tied a knot in his trunk.
If you’re lacking a little good cheer,
Go and tickle a bull in the rear.
For I’m sure that the rumor,
That they’ve no sense of humor,
Is a product of ignorant fear.
An extremely slim model, Miss Slater,
Was attacked by a croc and it ate 'er.
Said her trainer, Tough deal,
What a horrible meal,
We should throw it some greens and potater.
Amazingly, antelope stew,
Is supposedly better for you.
Than a goulash of rat,
Or Hungarian cat,
But I guess that something you knew.
I once had a gerbil named Bobby,
Who had an unusual hobby.
He chewed on a cord,
and now -- oh my lord,
now all that's left is a blobby.
My dog is quite hip,
Except when he takes a dip.
He looks like a fool,
when he jumps in the pool,
and reminds me of a sinking ship.
There once was a sloth named Sam,
Who said, "I don't give a damn!"
He hung upside down,
In a permanent frown,
His motto was "Chill, if you can!"
A mischievous monkey named Max,
Wore sunglasses, quite slick and relaxed.
He swung from the vines,
In the tropical pines,
While sipping banana smoothies as snacks!
A penguin named Penny was bold,
Wore a tuxedo even when cold.
She slid on her belly,
Through ice fields so smelly,
Claiming, "I'm fancy, or so I've been told!"
An elephant named Ellie so grand,
Had a trunk that she'd wave on command.
She'd blow kisses to all,
With a trumpet and call,
A greeting that echoed through the land!
A raccoon named Rocky, quite sly,
Snatched cookies from kitchens nearby.
But one night, he was caught,
By a grandma who thought,
He was the world's furriest pie thief, oh my!
A hippo named Henry was bold,
Tried ballet on riverbanks, we're told.
He'd twirl and he'd spin,
With a splashy, grand grin,
But his pirouette became a watery fold!

Related: For animal lovers looking for more similar laughs check out our list of 75 Funny Animal Puns!

Clever Wordplay Limericks

For our pun lovers out there, this next selection is for limericks that seamlessly weave clever puns and wordplay into funny stories!

A bear and a deer had a race,
In the woods, at a furious pace.
The deer took the lead,
Said the bear with a plead,
"I'm grizzly, but this is a disgrace!"
A vampire bat named Vlad,
Was nocturnal, oh so rad.
He'd fly through the night,
With a cape, quite a sight,
Said, "I'm batty and proud, not bad!"
A kangaroo tried to play chess,
But her pouch caused quite a mess.
She'd hop and she'd bounce,
Knocking pieces, no ounce,
"Checkmate," she cried, nonetheless!
An egg and a tomato in a race,
Rolled downhill, oh what a chase!
The tomato yelled, "Catch-up, my friend!"
The egg cracked, "This race is the end!"
A punny pursuit, in a veggie embrace!
A mattress once said with a sigh,
"I'm feeling quite under the sky.
No springs in my heart,
Just fluff and a part,
But I'm still a soft place to lie!"
A writer who loved a good pun,
Said, "Life's wordplay is such fun.
With a quip and a jest,
I'll write the best,
In the land of wit, I'm second to none!"
A clock that was always too late,
Said, "I'm sorry, it's just my fate.
My gears are all slow,
As time seems to go,
I'll catch up... eventually, mate!"
A lemon named Lou was so tart,
Said, "I'm puckerin', it's an art!
With zest and with zing,
I make taste buds sing,
A citrusy twist, right from the start!"
A puzzle with pieces a mess,
Said, "Put me together, no stress!
With patience and skill,
You'll solve me at will,
A mystery solved, oh the impress!"
Limericks I cannot compose,
With noxious smells in my nose.
But this one was easy,
I only felt queasy,
Because I was sniffing my toes.
A canner, exceedingly canny,
One morning remarked to his granny.
A canner can can,
Anything that he can,
But a canner can't can a can, can he?.
One Saturday morning at three,
A cheese monger's shop in Paree.
Collapsed to the ground,
With a thunderous sound,
Leaving only a pile of de brie.
A crossword compiler named Moss,
Who found himself quite at a loss.
When asked, Why so blue?
Said, I haven’t a clue,
I’m 2 Down to put 1 Across.
Is it me or the nature of money,
That's odd and particularly funny.
But when I have dough,
It goes quickly, you know,
And seeps out of my pockets like honey.
There once was a man from kanass,
Who's nuts were made out of brass.
in stormy weather,
he'd clack them together,
and lightning shot out of his ass.

Related: Are you a pun-enthusiast? Don't miss our popular page of 100 Funny Puns that is ranked by our visitors!

Limericks about Quirky Characters

Expanding our collection with the biggest section, these limericks are the most common and popular type. Each poem tells a character's tale or life, offering a condensed burst of humor within.

There was a young lady of Lynn,
Who was so excessively thin.
That when she assayed,
To drink lemonade,
She slipped through the straw and fell in.
There once was a boy named Dan,
who wanted to fry in a pan.
He tried and he tried,
and eventually died,
that weird little boy named Dan.
There was an odd fellow named Gus,
When travelling he made such a fuss.
He was banned from the train,
Not allowed on a plane,
And now travels only by bus.
There once was a farmer from Leeds,
Who swallowed a packet of seeds.
It soon came to pass,
He was covered with grass,
But has all the tomatoes he needs.
There was a young woman named Bright,
Whose speed was much faster than light.
She set out one day,
In a relative way,
And returned on the previous night.
There once was a man from Tibet,
Who couldn't find a cigarette.
So he smoked all his socks,
and got chicken-pocks,
and had to go to the vet.
There once was a man named Brice,
Who had a nasty head full lice.
He said, If I eat them,
Then I'll have beat them!
And besides they taste very nice.
There once was a child in Spain,
Who loved to play in the rain.
One day he tripped,
And broke his hip,
Now he is in serious pain.
There was a young lady of Cork,
Whose Pa made a fortune in pork.
He bought for his daughter,
A tutor who taught her,
To balance green peas on her fork.
A newspaper man named Fling,
Could make "copy" from any old thing.
But the copy he wrote,
Of a five dollar note,
Was so good he is now wears so much bling.
There was a young fellow named Weir,
Who hadn't an inch of fear.
He indulged a desire,
To touch a live wire,
And he celebrated by drinking beer.
There was a young lady named Perkins,
Who just simply lived on gherkins.
In spite of advice,
She ate so much spice,
That she ruined her internal working's.
The incredible Wizard of Oz,
Retired from his business becoz.
Due to up-to-date science,
To most of his clients,
He wasn't the Wizard he woz.
A young schoolgirl named Rose,
Is rather ashamed of her nose.
She distracts people's stares,
With the mice that she wears,
Hanging down from her clothes.
There is a young schoolboy named Mason,
Whose mom cuts his hair with a basin.
When he stands in one place,
With a scarf round his face,
It's a mystery which way he’s facing.
An ambitious young fellow named Matt,
Tried to parachute using his hat.
Folks below looked so small,
As he started to fall,
Then got bigger and bigger and SPLAT!
There was a young person called Smarty,
Who sent out his cards for a party.
So exclusive and few,
Were the friends that he knew,
That no one was present but Smarty.
There was a young girl from Rabat
Who had triplets: Nan, Pat, and Tat.
It was fun in the breeding,
but hell in the feeding,
as she found she had no tit for Tat.
An elderly man called Keith,
Mislaid his set of false teeth.
They'd been laid on a chair,
He'd forgot they were there,
Sat down, and was bitten beneath.
There once was a girl named Zoe,
She went out in her yard which was quite snowy.
She ate her brother,
Asked her parents for another,
So they had another named Joey.
There was a young lady of Kent,
Whose nose was most awfully bent.
She followed her nose,
One day, I suppose,
And no one knows which way she went.
There was a young lady named Rose,
Who had a large wart on her nose.
When she had it removed,
Her appearance improved,
But her glasses slipped down to her toes.
There once was a girl from Dubai,
who desperately wanted to fly.
But whenever she flapped,
that girl got so chapped,
that poor littl girl from Dubai.
There was an old man of Peru,
Who dreamt he was eating his shoe.
He woke in the night,
With a terrible fright,
And found it was perfectly true.
My ambition, said old Mr. King,
Is to live as a bird on the wing.
Then he climbed up a steeple,
Which scared all the people,
So they caged him and taught him to sing.
There was a young fellow named Clyde,
who fell in an outhouse and died.
Along came his brother,
and fell in another,
and now they're interred side by side.
An intrepid explorer named Petty,
Intended to capture a yeti.
But the yeti yelled, Freeze!
I’ve a gun—on your knees,
While my Dad gets the ring and confetti.
There was a Young Lady whose eyes,
Were unique as to colour and size;
When she opened them wide,
People all turned aside,
And started away in surprise.
There was a young lady from Niger,
Who smiled as she rode on a tiger.
They came back from the ride,
With the lady inside,
And the smile on the face of the tiger.
There was an Old Man with a gong,
Who bumped at it all day long.
But they called out, no more,
You're a horrid old bore,
So they smashed that Old Man with a gong.
There was a Young Lady whose chin,
Resembled the point of a pin.
So she had it made sharp,
And purchased a harp,
And played several tunes with her chin.
There once was a young boy named Nick,
Who by chance was always being kicked.
He tried not to fight,
For he was smart, kind and bright,
So he learned how to run really quick.
There was an Old Man with a beard,
Who said, It is just as I feared!
Two Owls and a Hen,
Four Larks and a Wren,
Have all built their nests in my beard!
There once was a young man called Kyle,
who worked at the circus a while.
He flew through the air,
with hardly a care,
and that's why his body's in a pile.
There once was a man from Peru,
Who had a lot of growing up to do.
He'd ring a doorbell,
then run like hell,
Until the owner shot him with a .22

Amusing Limericks on Relationships

In our closing category, we share the world of relationships and couples with a delightful collection of lihgt-humoured limericks.

There was a young man named Jake,
Whose dates were a piece of cake.
He'd bring flowers and wine,
Say, "You're so divine!"
But his cooking skills were a mistake!
My neighbor came over to say,
Although not in a neighborly way,
That he'd knock me around,
If I didn't stop the sound,
Of the classical music I play.
A man and his lady-love, Min,
Skated out where the ice was quite thin.
Had a quarrel, no doubt,
For I hear they fell out,
What a blessing they didn't fall in!
There was an enchanting young bride,
Who ate many green apples and died.
The apples fermented,
inside the lamented,
and made cider inside her inside.
I once fell in love with a blonde,
But found that she wasn't so fond.
Of my pet turtle named Odle,
whom I'd taught how to Yodel,
So she dumped him outside in the pond.
I met her in chat, she was neat,
her photo was pretty, petite.
we met for a meal,
I saw her for real,
I screamed and then ran down the street!
A woman in search of a mate,
Went on dates, but things weren't great.
She'd meet guys with a quirk,
Like a love for green slime and murk,
Her quest for romance was a comical fate!
A man and his cat, quite a pair,
Shared secrets in moonlit night air.
The cat would meow,
With answers so wow,
A feline friend's love, oh so rare!
A couple, quite different, you see,
One's tidy, the other carefree.
They'd argue and fuss,
But their love was a plus,
In their quirks, they found unity.
There once was a couple from France,
Who tried to learn how to dance.
They stepped on each toe,
But they laughed, don't you know,
In love's waltz, they found their romance!

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Other funny poems

If you want to continue reading more poems which will make you laugh, we have a page of funny haiku poems as well as a page on generic funny poems