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List of 50 Funny Puns and Jokes about Ducks

List of Duck Puns & Jokes Last Updated: October 27, 2025

A selection of duck related puns and jokes, perfect for a witty instagram caption, for putting in a birthday card or just for making somebody laugh out loud!

Duck related Puns

  1. What do you call a duckling who opens his presents early? A Peking duck!
    Duck Pun - What do you call a duckling who opens his presents early? A Peking duck!
  2. Why do ducks make bad surgeons? They tend to quack under pressure.
  3. Big overweight duck walked through my kitchen and quacked my tiles!
  4. Why did the duck get a red card? For fowl-play.
  5. Ducks like reading instructions, they prefer to wing it.
  6. The duck got a second job because he had too many bills.
  7. What time do ducks get up? The quack of dawn.
  8. What do ducks use to fix things around their house? Duck tape.
  9. What’s a duck’s favorite snack? Quackers and cheese!
  10. I can’t take my dog to the park as all the ducks keep trying to bite him. My fault for getting one that’s pure bread.
    Duck Pun - I can’t take my dog to the park as all the ducks keep trying to bite him. My fault for getting one that’s pure bread.
  11. My friend told me to stop making duck puns — he said they were too fowl.
  12. What do you call a duck that breaks into people’s houses? A robber ducky!
  13. Ducks make great detectives because they always quack the case.
  14. Ducks make terrible comedians, they always wing it.
  15. What game does a duck play at the bar? Bill-iards.
  16. The duck was in rehab because he was a quackaddict.

Punny sayings & phrases


These duck related sayings are great for Instagram captions, seasonal messages and more.
  1. That really just quacked me up!
  2. You're just a lucky duck.
  3. I've pond-ered it over.
  4. The art of se-duck-tion.
  5. Hope everything is all it's quacked up to be.
  6. I hope this fits the bill!
  7. This is an intro-duck-tion to my heart.
  8. Waddle I do without you?
  9. Just winging it.
  10. Stay calm and quack on.
  11. Just a roman-duck kind of day
  12. I don’t quack under pressure.
  13. Life without each other would be fowl.
  14. I love when you quack me up.
  15. Took to each other like a duck to water
  16. Totally quackers about you!
  17. Lets quack open the fun!

Duck Related Jokes

  1. Why do ducks lay eggs? If they dropped them, they would break.
    Why do ducks lay eggs? If they dropped them, they would break.
  2. When is roast duck bad for your health? When you’re the duck.
  3. Where do ducks go when they are sick? The ducktor’s.
  4. If a duck says “Quack quack,” what says “Quick quick?” A duck with hiccups.
  5. What side of a duck has the most feathers? The outside.
  6. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? Put it on my bill.
  7. What’s a duck’s favourite film? Lord of the Wings.
  8. What was the secret agent duck named? James Pond.
    Duck joke - What was the secret agent duck named? James Pond.
  9. Why do ducks have feathers? To cover their butt-quacks!
  10. What do you call a clever duck? A wise quacker!
  11. What do you call movies that ducks like to watch? Duck-umentaries.
  12. Why did the duck go to therapy? Because he was feeling a little quackers...
  13. Why did the duck go to the chiropractor? To get its back quacked.
  14. Why did the duck get detention? He couldn’t stop quackin’ jokes in class.
  15. Why do ducks fly south? Because it’s too far to walk.
  16. What do you call a duck floating on a river? Bob.
  17. What side of a duck has the nicest feathers? The outside.

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