75 Funny Animal Puns To Have You Roaring With Laughter

If you're a fan of animal humor, get ready to laugh your tail off with these hilarious animal puns! From cats to dogs, birds to fish, and everything in between, these puns are sure to tickle your funny bone.

Best Animal Puns

1. Why do cows wear bells? because their horns don't work!
2. Why are most horses so slim? Because they are on a stable diet!
3. Why couldn't the chicken find her eggs? Because she mislaid them.
4. A man was hospitalized with 6 plastic horses inside him. The doctor described his condition as stable!
   
5. Why did the bunny bang his head on the piano? He was playing by ear!
6. Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.
7. What do you call an alligator with a vest? Invest-igator.
8. By shear coincidence, all these sheep look the same.
9. Long fairy tales have a tendency to dragon.
10. Why did the bunny bang his head on the piano? He was playing by ear!
    
11. What do you call an alligator with a vest? Invest-igator.
12. By shear coincidence, all these sheep look the same.
13. What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
14. Why did the bunny eat the wedding ring? Because he heard it was 24 carrots.
15. What happens when a sheep, a drum and a snake fall from a cliff BA DUM TS.
16. I've got a chicken-proof front lawn. It's impeccable!
    
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17. What city has the largest rodent population? Hamsterdam
18. What's a cow eating grass? A lawn mooer.
19. What would bears be without bees? Ears.
20. I watched a documentary about beavers last night. It was the best dam show ever!

Cat Puns

21. What do you call a pile of cats? A meowtain.
22. I'm so purrfect that whenever I meet a pretty girl, I whisker away.
23. Cuddling a cat usually leaves you feline good.
24. Did you hear about the cat who swallowed a ball of yarn? She had a litter of mittens!
25. Why was the cat sitting on the computer? It wanted to keep an eye on the mouse!

Dog Puns

26. What do you call a dog magician? A labracadabrador!
27. Why did the dog sit in the shade? Because he didn't want to be a hot dog!
28. How do dog catchers get paid? By the pound!
29. What kind of construction are dogs best at? Roofing.
30. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was ticketed for littering.
    
31. The Dalmatian was hiding because he didn’t want to be spotted.
32. I went to the zoo today, there was only one animal. It was a shitzu!
33. I'm having a ruff day. Don't terrier self up about it. There's sure to be a pawsitive outcome!
34. When I asked my dog how his day was he said it was rough.
35. We call our dog Rolex, since he’s a watchdog.

Bird Puns

36. Why did the pigeon bring a map on its flight? It didn't want to wing it!
37. What do you call a bird that's afraid of heights? A chicken!
38. What do you call birds who don’t know song lyrics? Hummingbirds
39. Did you hear about the man who stopped eating chicken? He went cold turkey
40. When’s the best time to buy a bird? When it’s going cheep.

Fish Puns

41. DJ’s aren’t allowed to work at fish markets because they’re always dropping the bass.
    
42. My dad was a fisherman, but he quit because his net income wasn’t enough.
43. Did you hear about the illiterate fisherman? He was lost at C.
44. Some people don’t like fish puns, but they are kraken me up!
45. Have you thought of a fish pun yet, or do you need some time to mullet over?

Insect Puns

46. Why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey!
47. You can always eat snails if you’re trying to avoid fast food.
48. Yesterday I saw an ant-elope — the first wedding of its kind.
49. What do you call a fly without wings? A walk!
50. When Noah was loading the ark, where did he put the bees? In the ark-hives!

Farm Animal Puns

51. What happens when you try talking to a cow? Everything just goes in one ear and out the udder.
    
52. What do you call a cow that plays an instrument? A moo-sician!
53. If your piglet wants to be a wizard, there’s only one alternative: Hogwarts.
54. How do you count cows? With a cow-culator!
55. What do you call a pig that knows karate? Pork chop!

Forest-Animal Puns

56. What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!
57. How do trees access the internet? They log in!
58. How do you see a deer behind you? Hindsight.
59. Why did the squirrel take apart the car? To find its acorn-ditioning!
60. Why did the deer bring a ladder to the bar? He heard the drinks were on the house!

Zoo Animal Puns

61. Why did the lion always lose at poker? He was playing with cheetahs!
    
62. What's a snake's favorite subject in school? Hissss-tory!
63. How do you unlock a gorilla's phone? With the mon-key!
64. Why don't giraffes like fast food? Because they can't catch it!
65. What do you call a tired kangaroo? A pouch potato!

Reptiles and Amphibians Puns

66. What do you call a snake that is 3.14 meters long? A pi-thon!
67. Why did the turtle cross the road? To get to the shell station!
68. What did the alligator say after eating a clown? It tasted funny!
69. What happened to the frog’s car when his parking meter expired? It got toad.
70. Snakes are measured in inches because they don’t have feet.

Related: Like amphibians jokes, check out our list of 55 Funny Frog Puns & Jokes!

Ocean Animal Puns

71. How does a group of dolphins decide on something? – They flipper coin!
    
72. Why don't lobsters share? Because they're shellfish!
73. What do you call a fish with no eyes or fins? Fshhh!
74. How do crabs communicate? With sand signals!
75. Why are sharks hard to trust? They tell great white lies.

Whether you're a fan of cats, dogs, birds, fish, or any other creature, these puns hopefully helped make your day a little brighter. Share them with friends, family, or on social media to spread the laughter.

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Want to read more puns which will make you laugh? Read out page of Funny Puns as ranked by our website visitors. If you are looking for jokes instead, check out our list of 65 Seriously Funny Jokes.